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The Neurontin saga is probably the best known case of illicit off-label promotion. What you may not know is that, before the bust, there were plans for far more extensive marketing of Neurontin. In a PharmaLittle (Lil) exclusive, we can now tell that fuller story. What follows is a recent interview with Neurontin itself.
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Lil: So, we understand there were many more off-label uses planned for your promotion.
Neuron: Darn tootin’. Damn that Franklin [the “Neurontin whistleblower”]. We were heading for great things.
Lil: Such as …
Neuron: Well, I don’t know if I…
Lil: Don’t worry, we won’t tell anyone…
Neuron: Well, there was the Neurontin Cookbook.
Lil: Really.
Neuron: Yeah. We had the whole thing set up. Chicken Neurontine. General Tsai’s Neurontin. Neurontina Almondina Contadina. That was a farina.
Lil: So all that was in the pipeline?
Neuron: Hell, it was on the table. We had gigs lined up with Emeril and Martha.
Lil: No kidding…
Neuron: That was just the start. The Neurontin Diet. Neurontin for Dummies. The Neurontin swimsuit edition…
Lil: You’re kidding….
Neuron: No. A shoot in Cancun. Models wearing nothing but Neurontin. We even had a theme thong.
Lil: That’s impressive….
Neuron: It was amazing. And puff, up in smoke. And we’re left with epilepsy and a couple of neuropathies. And 430 mil down the tubes. For what?
Lil: Well, there’s still Lyrica, right?
Neuron: Between us, Lyrica is headed for Broadway. Big cast shlepping around with fibromyalgia until Lyrica turns them into professional dancers. Kinda like “A Chorus Line.”
Lil: Wow….
Neuron: All we need is the Musica.
Monday, January 12, 2009
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Loved this interview - and thanks for the reminder!
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome. Interested in the Cookbook?
ReplyDeleteWe also have a line of golf clubs....polo shirts....
ReplyDeleteThe musical was rumored to be a new Broadway version of The Wizard of Oz where Neurontin was able to provide the scarecrow with amazing clarity and insight, the tinman was able to move again without being oiled, and the cowardly lion was relieved of his phobias.
ReplyDeleteThe munchkins were to do a number that went-
Swallow the big yellow pill.
Swallow the big yellow pill.
Swallow, Swallow, Swallow, Swallow...
Sadly it was cancelled days before it's debut.
Hat tip to the Munchkins!
ReplyDelete